Friday, January 4, 2008

¿Cuando mi reflecion me dirá quién soy?

In the chaos and following mess of our New Year's Eve party, I didn't get a chance to sit down and do the personal reflection on the year past that's so wonderfully cathartic and cliche. Now that I've had some time to recover, clean, and settle into 2008, here are some thoughts. Enjoy (if I do, in fact, still have a readership).

2007 began with a leap into adulthood when I moved in with Steve in Dorchester and also took my first "real" job. I felt bad about breaking the lease with Laura, I really did, but I think that it really was the best thing to do for our friendship as well as my relationship with Steve. The job, however, was not a good move, as I was lead on, mistreated and disrespected. I left in mid-February and took a full time job at Irving House, where I made some great friends and realized that hospitality wasn't my calling.

In the early summer or so, the mix of being...not unhappy, but not happy at my job, being out of college, and not seeing my friends as often as I used to (probably because of the aforementioned factors and my move to Dorchester) made me crave something completely new. I started job searching like a maniac, all over the country, concentrating on Boston, New York, Philadelphia, San Francisco, and Los Angeles. Someone would have to bite, right? Wrong. Our lease was up on August 31st, and we'd have to decide what we were doing/where we were going ASAP. We thought that the job offer would happen and the move would follow, but we had to accept that we were going to have to choose a new 'hood and pray for work there.

So we did. We picked the Philadelphia area for several reasons, most of which seemed incredibly dumb when I got hit--hard--with depression a month or two after the move. It was really unavoidable, though; there were so many stressors that just kept adding up. New job (someone DID bite!), new car (bye bye money), new roommate (hello Rob), new geographical everything (goodbye sense of direction), family woes back on the left coast (good morning heartache), band problems for Steve (be the supportive girlfriend) and absolutely no friends of my own (stranger danger!). But I'm working really hard to better my situation, and can confidently say that I am succeeding (it'll always be a work in progress). The reasons for choosing Philly don't seem dumb anymore.

2007 was also full of great news (not that some of the stressors weren't good). The family business is booming, which meant high spirits for my dad and delicious little bonuses in my bank account. My mom got promoted at work which seems like a lot of work, but is certainly a welcome and well-deserved distraction for her. My dear friend Jenna got engaged to the man of her dreams, as did Christine (barely making the cut for a 2007 reflection). Crazy to think that next year's reflection will include their nuptials. Steve's family has really opened their hearts to me, and, although I don't think we're next, I'm confident that it will happen for us too, and I will officially be part of his family, and he mine (though it feels like that's the case already).

What's odd is that 2007 was missing something: a big vacation. And I think that's another call of adulthood, as it would have been funded entirely by me, and I certainly did not have the money. In late 2006, my family went to Mexico City. In 2007, Steve and I took weekend trips to Vermont, Maine, Connecticut, New York, New Jersey, and Philly, but we never went abroad together. We did spend two weeks in California, but there's nothing new about that (for me, anyway). The weekend trips were pretty amazing though...I snowboarded, I played slots (and won), I ate some amazing food and saw some great bands, I relaxed on the beach and did some fun shopping.

It was a good year. Awfully hard, but then it wouldn't seem as good if it wasn't.


Bobbie said...

I am keeping my fingers crossed for us in 2008 ... and hoping that we see each other a lot more than in 2007.

Who knows... maybe we'll even take a vacation?!

Madmom said...

Ah, change is what helps us grow, Pix. Many times it is not easy but it does change us for the better. (Take the pebble from my hand Grasshopper).

Bobbie said...

With a stop off in Atlantic city in order to pay for it. :)

I have not forgotten Morocco, worry not...